CHRISTINE M. VALENTíN

  • Home
  • About Me
  • Services
    • Individual Play Therapy
    • Family Play Therapy
    • Adult Therapy
    • Single Mom Support Group for Women of Color
    • Summer Camp for Parents 2023
    • Video Counseling
  • Location & Hours
  • Fees & Insurance
  • Blog
  • Contact Me
  • Privacy Practices Notice
  • Home
  • About Me
  • Services
    • Individual Play Therapy
    • Family Play Therapy
    • Adult Therapy
    • Single Mom Support Group for Women of Color
    • Summer Camp for Parents 2023
    • Video Counseling
  • Location & Hours
  • Fees & Insurance
  • Blog
  • Contact Me
  • Privacy Practices Notice

It's (Almost) a New Year and I Want To...

12/23/2021

0 Comments

 
Picture
Improve my self-esteem. Work on my personal relationship(s). Have more fun with my child(ren. The list can go on and on. Regardless of what is on your Resolution list, it is important to remember there are certain aspects that must hold true in order to increase your chances of success and reduce the likelihood of failing to achieve your goals/desires for this year. 

1). It Must Come From You- many of our intentions for change originate from good places but they are not often our own. In many cases, they can be other people's recommendations or beliefs of what we should be doing, what we should look like, how we should be living our life and/or what kinds of relationships we have. And while you may want to pursue such changes, unless you truly have the desire to embark on the journey for yourself, the chances of success can be minimal. Therefore, take some time to reflect on what you feel you have the energy for. 

2). You Must Have a Plan - Once you identify what YOU want to work on, you then decide how you want to get there. Devise a plan that is realistic with the pursuit of your goals by sitting down with a pen and paper and answering these questions:
     - what do you specifically want to improve?        - why do you want to improve?
                                                  - how can you make it happen?
Not sure how to make to happen? I personally find inspiration from listening to how professionals and non-professionals are navigating their journey. My favorite go to that fits into my mom life is podcasts. Searching for keywords and looking for episodes in the podcast app can be extremely helpful. 

3) You Will Need Perseverance -  Any aspiration worth attaining usually takes "blood, sweat and tears." In other words, hard work, dedication and routine are usually required. When you find yourself exhausted, wanting to quit, refer back to your  list of reason(s) for pursuing your goal(s) and review your plan of action. Your plan may need to be modified based on what you have learned about what works and what doesn't. Sometimes modifying the plan can help to reinvigorate your motivation. 

Overall, time and patience are required to reach your goals. And by time, I mean, time to get a handle on what does and doesn't work for you. And when I say patience, I mean, not being hard on yourself because you couldn't get from point A to Z within a given timeframe.


Good luck on your 2022 ambitions and be sure to leave a comment if you have questions or need resources. 

0 Comments

How Can I Avoid Working 24/7 Now That I Am Home?

3/28/2020

0 Comments

 
Photo by JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash
There is no doubt that these days many of us are adjusting our schedules and are dealing with uncharted territory. Aside from figuring out how to keep ourselves and our loved ones safe, many of us are also figuring out how to maintain a work-life balance. Below are three tips that may work  to help ensure you are not working around the clock. 

Create a schedule: Knowing what you have lined up for the day ahead can be stress reducing. What time you are waking up, in meetings, having lunch, having dinner, etc. are just a few things to include in your schedule. Be sure to also schedule fun activities like watching favorite shows/movies, calling family and friends and playing games. Doing so can help put your day in perspective and remind you about your life outside of work. It can also help you create boundaries with others who may continue to ask more of you.  

Stick to your days off: Now that many of us are set up to work from home, it can be too easy and tempting to continue to work after hours or even on our days off. Along with creating a schedule, identify which day(s) you are of. This can be essential to making sure you don't burn out. If you find yourself needing to play catch up, then give yourself permission to perhaps work for part of the day that you are off. But, the goal is to play catch up and not add on more responsibilities or make yourself more available to work. 

Remove Temptation: The saying "out of sight" out of mind can really hold true in a work from home situation. Removing objects that stimulate you into work mode is key when trying to avoid working 24/7. Try taking items like your laptop, your appointment book, school books etc., and placing them out of your vision. I personally, pack up my laptop and other work related items into a backpack and then place it in a closet. This way, even if I were tempted to do some work, when I am supposed to be off, I would have to actively unpack everything. Having to do so would at least cause me to think twice about what I am doing. 

There you have it. Just a few suggestions to help reduce feelings of stress and potential burnout. What we are going through right now is definitely challenging. While it is great we have the technology to continue doing our work, sometimes the ability to be too accessible makes us forget how to shut down and become inaccessible. 

What are tips and strategies you use to help prevent yourself from working too much?  Please share them below. 
Photo by JESHOOTS.COM on Unsplash
0 Comments

2 Key Components to a Healthy Relationship

2/4/2015

3 Comments

 
Picture
Within my therapeutic practice, I often work with individuals who experience anxiety related to problems they are having in their relationship. While some individuals will question whether they should do anything different, others are unsure if they should put in any more effort. In order to help them with their uncertainty, I often encourage them to work on some of the key components I believe are important to having a healthy relationship. 

Communication - Being able to openly and honestly talk with your partner about what is bothering you about the relationship is vital. Without this, you may find yourself not voicing your opinion about what bothers you, which can result in your partner believing everything is fine. The problem with one person believing everything is fine is they will continue engaging in the behavior you may find troublesome thereby increasing the chances of feeling resentment or irritation with your partner. Whether you are worried about your future, your sex life, your differences, etc., it is important to bring up any issues you have so that you can both work on improving the situation and resolving the problem. 

Respect - Having to communicate your feelings about what may be a sensitive issue for you or your partner can be hard to do, especially if one person is hot-tempered and/or very emotional. As a result, it is important to remember to be respectful. Essentially, you want to avoid saying or doing things that you know will upset your significant other. For instance, if your loved one despises when you walk away from an argument, then don't. Or, if he/she hates when you scream then try to speak in a low, calm tone. Showing respect can also be done by refraining from accusatory statements that place all the blame on your partner as it will only cause him/her to become defensive. 

Being in a committed relationship, especially when the honeymoon phase is over, is without a doubt challenging. While I realize the aforementioned suggestions are "easier said than done", it is crucial to understand that with patience and understanding a lot more can be accomplished as opposed to having anger and resentment. 



Do you believe there are other important components to a successful/healthy relationship? If so, please share them below. . 

3 Comments
    Picture

    Christine M. Valentín

    Welcome to my ​blog where I provide tips and guidance related to common struggles children and parents experience. Sign up below to receive such guidance directly in your inbox! 

    Sign Me Up for Tips to Help My Child

    Archives

    March 2023
    February 2023
    January 2023
    December 2022
    November 2022
    October 2022
    September 2022
    August 2022
    June 2022
    May 2022
    April 2022
    March 2022
    February 2022
    January 2022
    December 2021
    November 2021
    September 2021
    April 2020
    March 2020
    January 2020
    August 2019
    May 2019
    March 2019
    December 2018
    September 2018
    July 2018
    May 2018
    March 2018
    August 2017
    June 2017
    April 2017
    February 2017
    December 2016
    October 2016
    August 2016
    June 2016
    April 2016
    February 2016
    December 2015
    October 2015
    August 2015
    June 2015
    April 2015
    February 2015
    October 2014
    August 2014

    Categories

    All
    Am I Suffering From Anxiety?
    Anxiety
    Anxiety Related To Relationships
    Arguing
    Articulate
    Attention Seeking
    Avoidance
    Being Disliked
    Being Normal
    Big Emotions
    Bonding With My Child
    Break The Rules
    Burnout
    Caring What Others Think
    Change And Commitment
    Changes In Routine
    Child Development
    Communication
    Compromise
    Confidence
    Confrontation
    Depression
    Disorder
    Emotions
    Fear
    Forgivenss
    Getting Help
    Helping Someone Who Is Depressed
    Help With My Relationship
    Holiday Anxiety
    Holiday Depression
    I Don't Like My Child
    Improving Success
    Indecision
    I Want To Be Away From My Child
    Lack Of Confidence
    Lack Of Support
    Latina Support Group
    Levels Of Anxiety
    Losing It
    Love
    Low Self Esteem
    Low Self-Esteem
    Manage Stress
    Mental Evaluation
    Mom Support Group
    Negative Reactions
    New Year's Resolution
    Normal Parenting
    Panic Attacks
    Panic Disorder
    Parenting
    Parenting Books
    Parenting Relief
    Parent Stress
    Playing Games With Children
    Psychological Evaluation
    Relationships
    Respect
    Seeking Therapy
    Self Doubt
    Self-doubt
    Successful Relationships
    Testing Boundaries
    Testing The Connection
    Therapy
    Trial And Error
    Trouble Sleeping
    What Is Anxiety?
    What Is Depression
    What's Wrong With Me?
    Worried About My Loved One

    RSS Feed

This Site is not intended to provide psychotherapy advice. The Site is intended only for use by individuals in search of general information of interest pertaining to anxiety, depression and related topics. Content is not intended to replace or serve as substitute for professional consultation or service. Contained observations and opinions should not be misconstrued as specific counseling advice.
Photos used under Creative Commons from soekfoto, Thales, Pawel Pacholec, lisabirtch, Mickey JT, Muffet, apparena, aresauburn™, Minette Layne, die.tine, A Gude, stephcarter, Kathy McGraw, srqpix, sun sand & sea, photogirl7.1, W J (Bill) Harrison, srluke, catlovers