CHRISTINE M. VALENTIN, LCSW, LLC
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How Does the Holiday Season Affect Your Well-being?

12/5/2018

4 Comments

 
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The holiday season, for the most part, brings a sense of excitement and happiness to many individuals who look forward to being around family and friends, celebrating traditions, and having shorter work weeks. There are, however, other sentiments that individuals experience as well that are not as often discussed; Anxiety, anger, exhaustion, depressed are just a few.  

Anxiety - Holidays often equate to participating in family gatherings, which depending on family dynamics, can cause an individual to worry about various things. Concerns regarding religious and/or political disagreements, mom's approval of a new partner, whether dad will continue to express his disappointment with your career choice, etc., are just a few. Stressing about caring for your parents or spouse can also can also provoke anxiety . 

Depression - individuals who lack a support system, are not involved in a significant relationship or are going through a life-hardship can feel depressed and isolated. This time of year can trigger one's feeling of loneliness. Questions like, "What are you doing for the holiday?" and/or relationship oriented commercials can serve as reminders of what they don't currently have. 

Emotional exhaustion - sometimes the mere thought of all the planning, traveling and socializing a person will have to engage in, is enough to bring about a "cloud of gloom" or a sense of " being worked up." In other cases, memory of last year's disorder, dysfunction or drama can serve as a reminder of what an individual does not want to experience again. Plus, let's not forget the multitude of questions/interrogations
from friends and family an individual may have to respond to regarding the status of their life (i.e. being single, having children, etc.) 

With all of that said, it is important to be aware of your feelings during this time of year and learn how to cope and control them so as to prevent it from getting the better of you. Talking with friends and family you trust can help you learn how to best address your concerns. In some cases, a therapeutic professional can also prove beneficial to help sort out the various thoughts/feelings that some individuals don't fully understand. 

Do you notice a negative affect on your well-being during the holiday season? Please share your thoughts below as well as any questions you may have. 

4 Comments
Denise
12/16/2014 05:24:00 pm

Hello, I'm Denise, soon to become a social worker in Sweden.
My anxiety during this time of the year has to do with me and a family member, one of my sisters, that I've lost contact with during a period of 4 years. We only meet and talk a bit to each other during family occasions. Both of us have our birthday in December but neither of us congratulate the other anymore, since we don't celebrate our birthdays with family (I'm almost 30). We used to be very close, however that has turned into a big tension between us since our last argument. I never thought it would lead to this. At first I blamed myself for it. But after trying so hard to resolve things with my sister I've realized it's not just me.
Either way, I still feel sad and get anxiety during Christmas and New years eve because it reminds me of good times we used to have. Every time I see her I long to reconsiliate again but it never happens because we think so different about solving things. She wants to forget everything that's happened and just move on never talking about it. Were as I feel we need to talk about it, at least bit, so that we close the bad chapter between us properly.

Well, that's my anxiety. Although I still wish things were better between me and my sister, I've learned to manage my anxiety a lot better now. I've come to appreciate things that I have and love the relationships that still remain. I'm thankful for other things and can notice how lucky I am to even be able to celebrate these holidays.

Yours sincerely
//Denise

Reply
Christine M. Valentin link
12/17/2014 12:57:50 am

Hi Denise,

Thank your for being open and sharing your situation. I'm sure it must be extremely difficult to not be able to spend time with someone you love, especially if you have fond memories of previous years. I'm happy to hear, however, that you have learned how to manage this anxiety and are still thankful for what you currently have. I hope one day both you and your sister find a way to reconcile that allows both of you to be heard and feel appreciated. Happy Holidays and thank you again for sharing!

Reply
Ellen L Chacon
12/18/2014 10:41:46 am

I used to want to organize a Christmas dinner for all the people who, like me, had no one to be with. But I ended up getting married & having children. Still, it's a hard time for people who are homeless or alienated their families due to their drug use or whatever.
And, importantly, is the "empty chair" at the table for those of us who have lost someone. Christmas is tied up with family traditions. In my husband's case, never to have his mother's fruitcake (more rum than fruit, it couldn't go bad), his father's stuffing, the Carribean traditions of garlic pork & gin for breakfast, none of that, ever again. We can make garlic pork & play calypso music, but it's not the same.

Reply
Christine M. Valentin link
12/29/2014 07:03:57 am

Hi Ellen,
Thank your for sharing your personal situation. The "empty chair" can definitely be a sad reminder of those we have lost and can really cause a change in mood/energy in the home upon its realization. While it is definitely not the same without our loved ones, sometimes continuing to engage in certain traditions/rituals and remembering the joy they brought into our lives can help serve as a great way to memorialize them and pay tribute to who they were while they were present. It can also serve as a great opportunity to remind the younger generation about the person's significant to us and worth. I hope you and your family have a wonderful holiday season. Thanks again for contributing.

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    Christine 
    M. 
    Valentin

    As a licensed clinical social worker, I help individuals and families feel less anxious, less stressed and more functional. This blog is meant to offer some guidance to individuals to enhance their mental well-being. Sign up below to receive them directly in your inbox.

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  • Home
  • About
    • About Me
    • Location, Hours & Fees
    • Contact Me
  • Services
    • Individual Play Therapy
    • Family Play Therapy
    • Adult Therapy
    • Video Counseling
  • Forms
  • Privacy Practices Notice