Improve my self-esteem? Be more positive and less stressed? Work on my personal relationship(s)? The list can go on and on. Regardless of what is on your Resolution list, it is important to remember there are certain aspects that must hold true in order to increase your chances of success and reduce the likelihood of failing to achieve your goals/desires for this year.
1). It Must Come From You- many of our intentions for change originate from good places but they are not often our own. In many cases, they can be other people's recommendations or beliefs of what we should look like, how we should be living our life and/or what type of relationship we should be in. And while you may want to pursue such changes, unless you truly have the desire to embark on the journey for yourself, the chances of success can be minimal. Therefore, make sure your goal is what YOU really want.
2). You Must Have a Plan - Once you identify what YOU want to work on, you then have to decide how to get there. Devising a plan can make the attainment of your goal much more realistic. For instance, if your goal is to improve your relationship(s), then sit down with a pen and paper and begin listing what specifically you want to improve, why it needs improving, and how you can do so. Essentially, you want to outline the steps you need to take so as to achieve your goal. Depending on your goal, this step can be difficult. Should you find yourself stuck, consider reaching out to family, friends or a professional to help you.
3) You Will Need Perseverance - Any aspiration worth attaining usually takes "blood, sweat and tears." In other words, hard work, dedication and sacrifice are usually required; Hence, why the first two points are extremely important. When things get tough, when you find yourself exhausted and want to quit, refer back to your reason(s) for pursuing your goal(s) and review your plan of action. Doing so can help reignite your spirit and give you more energy to continue forward.
Whether you are trying to lose weight, trying to improve your personal relationship or want to enhance who you are as a person, the above steps can be beneficial to achieving success.
What other strategies or recommendations do you believe can help? Please share them below.
One common theme among clients I work with is low confidence. For some, low confidence can affect career goals, friendships and intimate relationships. Low confidence can cause a person to feel inadequate, care too much about what others think, and disbelieve or discredit compliments he/she receives. Below are a few recommendations that have the potential to boost your confidence.
1) Create an Accolade List - One recommendation I suggest to individuals who are struggling to remember the positive qualities they have is to create a list of positive feedback they have received. Whether it is about your work or personal life, listing your current and past accomplishments and the praise you received can help lift your spirits and remind you about the good you have to offer to others when doubt begins to surface. Keeping the list handy and referring to it frequently is key, especially when you are feeling down.
2) Pay Attention - nowadays we are so connected and involved with our devices that taking a moment to explore our surroundings is often considered a luxury. For those clients who believe no one is interested in them, I often challenge them to take a moment to remove his/her ear buds, look up from his/her phone and observe his/her environment. The purpose of this exercise is to get them to take notice of things they may have not realized is happening around them (i.e. the person admiring them from afar, positive comments from a passerby, etc.)
3) Increase Positivity, Decrease Negativity - building one's confidence takes time and insight. Tapping in to what makes you feel good about yourself, healthy eating, quality sleep and surrounding yourself with positive people are all key ingredients to making you feel your best. Positive people who support who you are and are willing to help you become a better person are essential to improving your self-confidence. Surrounding yourself with negative people, on the other hand, may make you feel weird like an outcast and/or unworthy; Attributes that can ultimately hinder your confidence and self-esteem.
The road to building your confidence is not smooth and sometimes there are some road blocks. The above suggestions can help start the journey. Have these suggestions worked for you? Do you have anything else you would recommend to someone who is trying to build his/her confidence? Please share your comments below.